I’m still in inquisitive-hate relationship with…

…Facebook. It’s all because of my friend who visited me the past few days. I was surprised to realize how addicted one could be with this ‘game’. She was totally engrossed by it almost all the time. I could not help to ask many questions what she did and how it works after she jumped to her feet asking us to leave Ubud soon. Her friends were on their way to Ubud! She knew the fact from Facebook!

Apparently she was not alone in constantly posting activities in Facebook through cell phone. Makan di Bebek Bengil. Menuju ke Seminyak. Belanja di toko beads. Makan di Warung Made. It’s all about our trip to drop her off in Legian. I was surprised that she could actually see her 241 friends’ activity real time as they see hers. This is like having Tomagotchi – virtual pet – in the old days. So unreal!

To cut a long story short, I signed up Facebook again this morning. Under a false name for sure. My intention is one… to see how things work. I spent all morning giggling with my cousin about the concept of Facebook while I pushed all buttons. Said that it’s human nature that we like to nurture relationships. But care to check out 241 activities while posting ours every now and then? I open my blog with stories of my days but hardly any closed ones check out. How do I know? They still have question What are you doing right now? – the main idea of Facebook.

I enjoyed lunch sitting on low stool in a clothing shop in Ubud market. I was hungry that the owner of the shop helped my cousin and I bought tipat with vegetable. It was good! Driving to Denpasar was enjoyable too. My cousin left Bali this evening. It’s only four days. My daily habit changed tremendously during my guests’ visit. I also learned from them – like always.

At the end of the day, I could say that I’d still prefer to exclusively post my activity in my loved one’s Inbox. One to one. Not one to 241.

No! Don’t publish!

I had the busiest…

…birthday of all. Yea, today is my birthday and I’m glad to have made the day felt different. I used to plan a get-together with loved ones (friends and relatives) back in Jakarta. And last year I had a quiet birthday with a friend from Jakarta in Ubud. This year? I have some 45 birthday text messages and some birthday emails that I haven’t had a chance to reply. I simply didn't have time.

I had a full day with the girls. Another girl arrived from Jakarta after midnight last night. I brought my guests to meet my dear Ubud friend. We drove up to Tegallalang to see the craftsmen village and had lunch in my favorite café overlooking palm forest. After lunch, I had made an appointment to visit an orphanage in Bedulu – about 15 minutes from Ubud. We were on time. The place is easy to find.

There were some 73 kids in the premises – a Balinese family compound. The orphanage is run by a Balinese couple. Orphans are children with one parent and even children with both parents. Some six kids live in the compound, the rest go home after finish the after-school program in the orphanage. All of these kids need sponsors because their parents cannot afford the cost of sending them to school. The sponsors mostly are from Holland and America (at the moment).

As a sponsored kid, they have their own bank account. She/he has to make a ledger on how the money is used. The ledger and the report card from school are sent regularly to her/his sponsor. The kids are required to write an email once a week (at least) to the sponsor to keep the communication going. We were amazed to see kids of 8 to 12 years old looked comfortable speaking in English. They were so confident. Said the email correspondence has helped their fluency.

We attended two English classes to see how the kids doing. One class was run by a Dutch volunteer of 18 years old. She is going to stay for three months before she enters college later this year. The other English class for under ten years old was run by the staff. It's nice to see enthusiastic kids. They sang us five songs before we left. The first song touched me. You are my sunshine. My only sunshine. You make me happy!

We handed our gifts to them before home. I brought books I bought early this week and some percussion instruments for the kids to play music. My friend from Jakarta brought a box of donated books (new and secondhand) from an organization she belongs. The organization collects books from donators – individual or company – and distributes to small but established libraries throughout Indonesia. It's not easy to describe the feeling of seeing the kids' eagerness to check out the books from the boxes. A girl who's in charge to take stock had been ready to do her duty. The percussion added to the chaos. It's loud – heard and unheard!

The idea of visiting an orphanage has inspired some of my good friends. Three friends sent me their donation. As my friend in Ubud and I plan to visit other orphanages around Ubud, I save the fund for next visits. Learning from the visit, my friend and I have an idea to look for projects orphanages need then raise fund through our network. We are excited to do more for the community.

Drove back to Ubud was fun. The loudness had given us different feeling. My friend felt a bit deaf of being there for almost three hours that said she needed margarita to clear up. So we had margaritas! Being shaken on the way to my friend's house, we were ready to 'dance' by the time we got there. The margaritas worked! My friend gave us a house tour that cleared up margarita from our system. We were all back to ourselves when left the house.

My birthday hadn’t come to an end, it seemed. At home, I had Mbo Yan and Ayuk waiting in my bale. They brought my favorite birthday cake! They sang a birthday song and I cut the cake. My first cut went to Mbo Yan. My Ubud connection. The girl who had helped me to enter my new life here.

Me and my birthday cake. I made a wish!

One of my guests has arrived and…

…the other might still be on the way. Might? Yes, because she didn’t give a clear message about her whereabouts. As often. That’s fine. One guest is nicely enough now. We talked non-stop about many things. She is my online chat-pal for years. Not long since we reconnected. I guess I have known her 18 years now.

And always, I became a tourist in my own village. I took her to Monkey Forest and I ended up posing with her like tourists. Auch! She likes photography so she shot every now and then. I realized now that many of my friends met two characters: likes photography and enjoys gadgets. I call her Miss Gadget. She has two cell phones that are GPRS online but she is bound to my rules – no texting when we are ‘connecting’ like having meal or chatting. When I excused a second to check out text message, she looked happy since she could peek at hers. It was fun. We both learn to live offline. Not easy, really.

Anyway, we don’t set plan of what to do tomorrow. We just take it easy. Offline.

Us in Monkey Forest. Our master picture to show our size difference.

Today I’m in the mood to do…

…more UNPACKING of my ”years of being a shop-aholic!” My good friend in Ubud emailed me in the morning. She didn’t even have time to call. I smiled remembering my days of decluttering stuffs from my years of being a shopaholic. I have passed the days – the days of being a shopaholic. Say it again?

I spent morning in an oasis with my different-world friend – my hair colorist. I met him once a month and really he is like an oasis of different world. He has both sides of the world: male and female point of views, Javanese and Balinese approaches, crazy but know-how-to-behave… He is also my extended television. I’d liked to ask him What’s hot in the infotainment? Then he would tell me non stop who’s going through divorce, who’s dating who, who’s pregnant, who sues who, who has love scandal… I only needed to interrupt with a question every now and then to keep the gossip going. It was fun!

I spent all afternoon tying loose ends. Washed car (in car wash I mean), checked out telephone line in Telkom office, groceries shopped… I’m a bit nervous preparing the house for two royal guests who will come tomorrow noon. This is going to be my first time to have two for sleepover. Oh, I once had for one night but one had to sleep on couch. Not this time. I have futon already.

Hm I look forward to adventuring together with girlfriends.

Two worlds near restaurant where I had lunch – lotus pond and rice field with a fake guard.

I hadn’t made up my mind…

…about what to bring to an orphanage on my birthday. Time has been ticking away, I only have one day left to prepare – tomorrow. I called the orphanage manager to find out what the kids need at the moment. A classroom has just been built so that is still empty. They need stuffs for the classroom and their mini library. I also tried to find out about their other activities but nothing is specific. They dance and play not so much music because lack of tutor.

I made myself ready in no time and asked Ayuk to come with me to Denpasar. It was fun ride in hot noon. Glad I brought Ayuk with me. I had no idea what kids need from such a big bookshop. Ayuk helped me with ideas what they need and might like to read. Some books are really interesting. Like history books for kids with time line that has nice graphic. I could not resist but buy a set for myself. I told Ayuk I am more than ready to relearn world history now, to refresh what I have known for I have the interest now unlike when I was in elementary school. Ayuk laughed. She picked up an English dictionary for herself and before I realized I stood there in the bookshop tutoring her English grammar. I might need to have an English session with her. I could see she has the interest.

I had nice day with Ayuk and nice evening with my jeweler friends in Sanur in the evening. Yes, I drove downtown twice today. It was fun and not fun. Actually I enjoyed it very much driving the narrow and winding road of Singapadu. So much challenge to share the road with motor bikers, people went to temples with offerings, and dogs. It was a nice dinner as usual. My friend was excited that she’s going to be a grandma this year and the other son won an award for his documentary movie. I could see how proud they are as parents. Lucky kids, lucky parents.

While I keep thinking of how to share a bit of happiness with lucky kids without parents.

Kids could totally be themselves anytime anywhere.

Life as a single…

…is interesting. The other day a friend told me that he doesn’t have the luxury to have ‘activities’ in kitchen because being a nomad the past three years he could not nest anywhere. He doesn’t have the luxury to warm breads and make smoothie like me because he doesn't have 'kitchen' anywhere. It got me thinking but I understand. It must be not easy.

This morning another friend said that I’m lucky to have someone who can help me anytime I need. I looked at ceiling while pondering. He is right! I have no one around so like this morning when I found my gas bottle empty, I had to call Pak Agung. And in the afternoon when I felt something big moving in my kitchen. I closed the door and dialed Pak Agung’s number. Help!

It turned out I had a long lizard in the kitchen. The same lizard I saw climbing trees this morning. I must have invited him to come in since I had a slight thought of what if he comes into my kitchen. Anyway, the poor lizard would end up to be lizard oil in no time. Pak Agung planned to fry it.

So how’s life as single again? A warung owned by a Javanese has become my dapur kotor – where I could have big meal if I crave. That’s the concept of a dapur kotor in Java. Big meal, means nicer meal, that has 'smell' and needs an effort to make is prepared in a dirty kitchen. My kitchen at home is actually a pantry with a stove. But I’m happy as I don’t need to eat that much. So going to 'dapur kotor' once in a while has its own luxury. Especially on a day like today when the newspaper had weekly 'interesting' attachment. Yes, I read daily newspaper every time I had lunch in the warung. Other luxury I don’t have at home. Or, I prefer not to have…

What else? Like Carrie in Sex and the City, singles have SSB (Secret Single Behavior). Shall I mention mine? Among mine are lie down on bed for a few minutes after a long tiring activity, observing animal’s movement (from dog, lizard, gecko, to big bees), staring out at the forest… Hey, of course I still have other SSBs but I better keep it as secret.

It’s dark moon today. Tilem. Sleep.

Me and My Book by Dolo.

I spent Saturday evening like…

…a good girl. I am a good girl. I like to stay in that some times my friends kicked me to go out more. Anyway, I indulged in things I like to do after loads of ironing since early evening. I was tempted to finish up Sex and The City Season 6 – the last season! Yea, I’m crazy. I happened to get all seasons DVDs in Manila.

Well, it took 1.5 hours only to watch the last three episodes. The story finishes so it creates its own suspense of what might be the end story of each single woman. It’s a very nice ending. One has hope to get an adopted child, one manages to live with cancer and get a steady boyfriend, one is 'successful' to realize her need for a nest with family, and the main character – Carrie – finds her true love after experiencing the extreme ups and downs in the course of six years relating with her man.

"The most exciting, challenging and significant relationship of all
is the one
you have with yourself. And if you find someone
to love the you
you love, well,
that's just fabulous."
CarrieI liked when Carrie finally admits that she needs hard love, the ‘cannot live without you’ love. Who doesn’t want to have such love relationship? I learn from the series that to find a true love one needs to bungee jump, to just do it, to find out. Communication is a major issue in a relationship that I have known. That listening does not come easy for many and unfortunately this is the most important element in a good relationship. What I need, what you need. So when I found Carrie’s windup? I could not agree more.

The scene of the characters after a reunion – a decision to move forward by ending a season of singleness – taken from the HBO website.

This is the end of…

…the four-day project. My curtains are all washed now. I am happy enjoying whiter and fresher look of my surroundings. Anticipating guests has given me an extra busy-ness around house. Like always. And I need it. I need a reason to have a closer look at my stuffs. Cleaning here and there. Never have enough time to clean all.

My good girlfriend in Denpasar came over to have lunch with me and shared a big news. She owns a townhouse in Denpasar! While I’m happy to get an ID, she’s happy to get a… house! We’re talking about settling down in Bali that in her case she’s really in the dark but she could not think of other place at the moment. She smiled when I told her that I was busy with the thought of a house warming four months from now. So excited!

I’m happy that I have finished homework of the week today. A big homework for next week has been waiting. Monday is Chinese New Year. The Year of the Ox, the start of a good year for Fire Horse. I polished my nine-eye dzi bead from Tibet.

Blow blow blow…

One of my new surroundings.

Today is a big day for…

…me. I got my driving license renewed in Gianyar so it’s official now that I belong to the island because I got a local ID at the same time. Now I could have all papers done in Bali although I still keep my Jakarta ID. I am penduduk Bali now.

It makes my day. I didn’t mind to experience my car ran out of battery again. I took time to chat with Made Jepun and her meme while waiting for Ketut to pick me up. Ketut, my ex staff, was so nice to arrange everything for me. I enjoyed our trip to the police station in Gianyar. I liked the busy city. It looked so different than other parts of Bali. I told Ketut how I appreciate being driven because I enjoy looking around. Thing I hardly did when driving.

We had a really nice discussion about business. How the business situation has killed our creativity to decorate our shops and diversify merchandise. Ketut also shared me his suggestions for Pallava that he really cared. We talked about my present staff that often had negative thought. We both believed in good thing like positive thought. I would process his idea to balance negativity in Pallava. What a discussion!

And afternoon was nice. I spent it with my dear friend who liked to ask when the next time I buy air ticket. She thought I was away too much and leaving her behind. I hugged her. I’d missed her too.

So we planned our big thing over lunch and doing cultural – checking out an exhibition in Mas and some artist studios on the way back. I told my friend that I really enjoyed our time together because we could kick each other to do our thing. We hardly stopped stimulating each other to create and do more. And when one said I need a whip! the other is ready with one. It was nice!

Today Made in Bali has a meaning to me…

I believe this is my first picture for official document – my diploma in 1975.

There are times when I stop…

…and analyze myself. I had a heavy complaint to a good friend via online chat this afternoon. Not serious but could be serious in my view. She innocently unintentionally betrayed our mutual friend by not sharing with her her plan to meet me in Ubud next week. I believe our friend wouldn’t mind or even thought about it but I just didn’t agree on the general idea.

I was smiling when typing what I thought. Emoticons had helped me showing my true feelings here and there. But what an emoticon can do? We have abused the true meaning of an emoticon by using it excessively in online chat till it loses its true meaning. And who cares? It’s just an emoticon. Yes, but think about it? Emoticons are supposed to give tone to our true emotion when chatting online. Sigh!

What has made me thinking about it? My friend wrote I know you are smiling now. I was but I insisted that she had to know what I intended to convey, what I wanted her to realize. I mean it. I chuckled – not at mistake my friend made but at myself. I learned that often I must have shared people mixed signs about my feelings. Only people who know me very very very well could read me right. That my angry or smiley look could not be translated as is in certain contexts. My point is… now I know that some times I could not get my message through. People need something easy to read. True emotion along with true expression. Go offline!

So yes, I had an interesting day… at home again. I already have a plan for my birthday next week. It’s been long I didn’t make plan for others and myself on my birthday. I want to make it special especially for others.

A poster by a gallery in Ubud. Nice title.

If it was not because of my online friend…

…I would not have watched Mr. O’s inauguration last night. I don’t have TV and I know that my Internet connection would not be good enough to watch live event online so I didn’t expect anything. Going out and watch together somewhere was not in my agenda since this is not Jakarta where I could just go to a big hotel to meet people.

I chatted with three friends who were waiting for the inauguration to start. I downloaded Flash Player CNN required to watch online without much expectation. I was lucky it seems. I managed to download the player just before the inauguration started. I watched the preparation and Franklin sang although it didn’t run smoothly. I gave up a while after Mr. O started his speech. There’s no point to try to listen since the stream was erratic. I thanked my friend for suggesting me to stay up to watch then resigned to sleep. It was fun to join my online friends who were lucky to have both the Internet and TV.

It seems that I could get good connection last night because the majority of the Internet users were busy in front of TV. On the contrary, I could not get connected almost all day today. Everybody checked out YouTube? Actually I wanted to check out at least the text but… no steady connection. It’s fun to observe how people use the Internet.

I spent half day at home looking after curtains and plants again. A continuation. I haven’t set goals for the year. A friend shared me an online goal tracker. It’s a good idea but I haven’t got items to list. Do I have goals? I do but long-term goals not daily. Do I have habits that need to be tracked? Hm.

Without any goals for the day, I went out in the afternoon. My favorite time to watch happy dogs following their masters in the streets. I checked out Neru and did grocery shopping. I was too late to do other stuffs.

Anyway, I enjoyed the best time to enjoy Ubud.

My living room that looks like an aquarium without curtains.

My neighbor friend just knew…

…that I’m already around. Welkam hum. He greeted me through text message. He knew that I’m around because he observed escalation of activities next door. Yea… I contacted Pak Agung in the morning and since then he must have looked busy.

He brought me three stems of big purple orchid. It has become his ritual to greet me with flowers from his garden. He is sweet period. I had a house project for him. He took off half living room curtains to bring to laundry. I came to a point that I could not wait anymore. I hadn’t had a chance to wash them since I moved in 1.5 years ago.

Then he changed pots of plants I brought from Malang. I don’t like plastic pots while terracotta pots are not easy to find. He made it anyway. Plants have become my new interest now though ironically it came after Mama passing. Pak Agung also cut a big tree that leaned on my shower wall. Tidying garden could be fun. I’m happy.

It seems that I have started to live like Balinese. They stay home but earning from business they cultivate outside like have rice field, rent cars or villas, run telephone booths… It’s typical business of a resort island. Business runs by itself. I thought about the idea after listening to never end chat behind my house and observing my landlord who has relaxed time with his family every morning. The family stays in one of empty houses near my house. It’s nice to have my landlord close so an incident like broken water pump could be handled quickly. Yea… this morning I woke up with dry tap.

I had nice day at home in the heat. It was hot upstairs and downstairs was the same since I took the curtains off. I didn’t have appetite to go out when I still have things to do at home. And afternoon was hilarious. I experienced reconnection and disconnection. My friends almost passed out when I said that I love Facebook. Only today I got the advantage of checking out Facebook that has given me information about people I want to know. And the good thing about it… I don’t have to sign up to see the main page that tells just enough about someone. I’m happy! Of the experience, I closed my LinkedIn account out. My good friend who had invited me – that I was gladly to reply – would always have my details in her contacts. I am very sure of that.

It was really fun.

A wheel in the front yard of my family farm in Malang.

Women that look strong are actually…

…weak. My good neighbor friend had told me about what he believes many times. He gave me some examples in his family: his little sister who appeared strong but could not do anything about her bad-behavior husband and his sister-in-law who appeared weak but could make his brother do anything she wanted. It’s interesting!

Hey what’s my point? Okay, I feel weak today. I see myself as a weak person that looks strong although it has nothing to do with the power of making people to do things I want. It’s simply because my heart broken when I parted with Dhana. I thought a lot about the split feeling I felt since I decided to travel home today. Aaarrghh…

I felt mildly miserable even more after learned about Jakarta house in crisis. The helpers wanted to go home in very short notice without a clear reason. I kept quiet in taxi on my way to Surabaya. Why should I be involved in other household crisis? I made a few phone calls to help and decided to limit my involvement. I have enough issues to battle.

It was a nice trip. I’m glad. And meeting a very good friend in airport although less than five minutes only has brightened my day. My was partner in crime. I didn’t feel well actually but glad I managed to smile wholeheartedly when changing sheets before shower. It seems I have looked forward to resigning soon. I miss my bed, my life neutralizer.

Wish I could have the luxury kids always have ready to enjoy. Loosen up.

My days in Malang are usually…

…‘do-your-own-thing-together' days. Dhana and I often got up early so we were both busy since early. We did our own thing but together. He watched cartoon on television and I watched DVD on my laptop. He played game on his laptop, I did my stuffs on mine. He cook in the kitchen, I stretched in the garden. It’s the usual view.

Today is one of those DYOTT days. The day felt long because we started very early. The houseboy spent all day looking after Mama’s garden then packed up plants I plan to bring tomorrow. A good childhood friend came over at noon till afternoon. It was really quiet in the big house especially when Dhana and I took… a nap! Yea. Thing I did the past two days for half an hour.

I will leave for my home tomorrow early in the morning. I asked Dhana if he would like to come with me despite I don’t have two important ‘toys’ he needs: internet and TV. He preferred to stay in Malang and do his own thing to spend the semester break. It got me thinking that I might have to consider installing an entertainment in the house for loved ones.

So today is quiet like I had expected yesterday. Here and elsewhere.

An old church in the main street of Malang.

It’s another day out…

…for Dhana and me. We took my friend to Eyang’s neighborhood to take pictures of old houses and buildings. Eyang lived in an old housing complex that has art deco style. Some houses have been rebuilt into completely new (I hate to say) ugly although luxury houses, some have gone through minor changes to keep the original style, and some looked abandoned which are better than seeing new no-style houses.

It was nice morning. We had noodle before took my friend to airport. We had a hilarious discussion in car about… Facebook vs. blog! It was so fun that we had different view about both ways of connecting with people. It started when my friend said that he enjoyed checking out his Facebook so much lately since he got many new connections from friends of the past. Dhana and I were like… eewww!

He could not understand our point of not wanting to connect, we don’t see his point why we should mix our networks. It was a really hot discussion with lots of laughter in our part because he could not see ours. He thought blogging is an awful way to be 'naked'. He forgot that with blogging we have so much control about how we want people to see us but with Facebook? I gave him an ugly example of what happens if we happen to befriend with someone who has improper lifestyle in her/his other network that then people associate her/his improper behavior with us? When we got airport, the discussion died down that I thought… my friend finally got a little bit of our point.

We had another mild hot discussion while waiting for call to board. I was not happy to realize that I was intrigued to be in such discussion. Travelers with slight limitation in seeing things, I should leave him alone. I shared with Dhana that whatever inconvenience I felt, I actually had a good time having a friend with different point of view because then we have some things to discuss. With Dhana who often thinks alike, we don’t have much stuff to discuss.

It’s Dhana’s birthday. He added butter sauce to his Red Velvet cake in the morning but we haven’t had a chance to have it since we were home with full tummy this evening. Dhana wanted to keep his birthday tradition with Mama – dinner at a pizza place with the whole family in Malang. There were ten of us this evening. It was hilarious.

What a full days! I look forward to having a quieter day tomorrow.

My favorite house since I was a kid that looked abandoned the past years.

Going going gone…

…my friend texted me after learning that I would be away again a day before I left Ubud. I know she missed me when I was on end-of-year holiday the other week. That’s when I realized that I only stayed in Ubud eight days and only met her once. She wanted to make one big thing when I come back. I look forward…

And yesterday two girlfriends in Jakarta screamed out loud learning that I canceled my plan to go to Jakarta this weekend. I just knew that I didn’t want to go. I could not find one good reason why I should go. Jakarta is flooded in some parts at the moment. Who wants to be trapped? And actually I could start doing my stuffs in Bali. I told myself that since I have moved to Bali, I have to start getting any administration I need done in Bali – not depends on Jakarta anymore. Start of the year is a good start.

I had nice day in family farm with Dhana and my friend. We visited a kindergarten my uncle manages that I visited first time today. It was really fun to see some 70 kids in two-classroom school. They were about to leave school so everybody was excited. I realized that kids could be so loud. I mean literally loud! They liked to shout out loud. It was really fun to see them dancing for us and later singing before left school. It’s a totally different world!

Later my uncle’s assistant took us to a newly built dam near a pine forest not so far from our farm. It was a nice ride in the heavy drizzle. We finished the tour in a seedling farm that sells plants and fresh cut flowers. I found myself became more interested in plants – thing I hardly felt when Mama was still around. My friend bought quite a lot of plants and I took some cute plants from Mama’s garden. I would be happy to start to look after them now.

It’s already afternoon when we got back. We spent more than half day visiting the village. My friend was surprised to find the village was not as undeveloped as he thought. So Malang. I enjoyed surprising my friend by showing him sophisticated parts of my hometown. He only said that he would definitely come back soon – even without me around.

Dhana spent early evening making his birthday cake – Red Velvet Cake. It was a perfect cake until he moved it from the mold. It was hilarious since he broke the cake like earth being shaken by earthquake. The taste was good but we could only have it after he covers the cake with frost tomorrow morning!

We all look forward to celebrate his birthday…

The kindergarten kids were tamed by camera.

It takes me a few mornings…

…to get used to morning prayer call from a mosque near Mama's house. I awoke around 4:00 and stayed in bed. I felt tired. My trip from Ubud to Malang went well only long as usual. A friend flew from Jakarta and met me in Surabaya. It was a spontaneous plan. It’s nice to have company although we both fell asleep in car.

Malang was drizzling and cool. It’s so nice. I had a meeting in the afternoon then took my friend to see Malang. He likes taking pictures. Like always, a tourist can make me as local a tourist too. I don’t remember I ever walk Tugu Malang on the side and near the pond. I also passed my high school in an old school complex near Tugu Malang. It was a nice after-rain walk.

It was still early when I got email from a gallery owner I met last Saturday. He sent me information about The WINS Project that provides financial and other means of support for a yayasan located in Bedulu, near Ubud. I checked out the website and was amazed by what foreigners do in our community. I was touched. A project like this has reminded me that my issues are nothing.

I had nice day with nephew Dhana and my friend. They were so patient waiting for me running errands. They also had good time in a mall, I guess, while I did my stuffs. Anyway, I’m happy that I made a significant progress on these ‘extra arrangements’. Like all, I want to tick those off my list soon!

Symbol of the city – Tugu Malang – located near my high school.

I could hardly breathe…

…this morning. I didn’t realize that I had a mountain Everest homework before I leave tomorrow. I had to run numbers in Excel for my staff; then label each piece of jewelry to display in Neru; and then the usual daily ritual like did laundry and online banking, replied emails, and talked with a good friend on phone!

I thought I had had a long morning since I started very early. I had not. I felt like I had no time. I often felt that way – like I don’t have enough time to do this and that. So I reviewed what had happened while waiting for my air ticket to be ready. I was sweaty and caught breath.

I think I know. I’d like to rush things because I want to do things the soonest. I want to make sure I don’t run out of time so I do everything quick quick like there’s no tomorrow, there’s no next hour. I’m quite forgetful so I have to make sure everything is done now.

I spent half afternoon in Neru. I redecorated the window display with my friend’s jewelry. Mine haven’t been ready. I thought I had time to prepare. No. I only stay in Ubud one week, even my laundry from the past trip haven’t done all yet.

Glad I have time for myself in the end. I have nice evening after ironing and packing. Getting ready for another morning run to airport. Tomorrow.

A warung near my house that is a superb place to unwind after a whirlwind day.

I just awoke a few minutes when…

…I thought something not exactly right about my friend’s jewelry price. I got up and check out the receipts. I didn’t wait long, I run the numbers in Excel and before morning over I had made appointment to meet up with her in Sanur. She canceled haircut to have business meeting only. She met several friends before she leaves for Australia tonight.

I was not sure about ‘bargaining’ actually. I don’t like bargain and I don’t feel comfortable to see people bargaining. I thought it’s ugly to negotiate an ego. I’m not a tough negotiator because I don’t like to be in a ‘negotiation’ – like I don’t like to be in an argument. So I was a bit nervous when I left Ubud.

Good I brought that up! I didn’t have to say a word. My friend just said Hey I made a mistake, give me your sheets! She adjusted the price and bang! I felt my confidence back. Confidence to have her stuffs in my place with the right price. Phew… Show up!

I ran errands on the way back. I have to get things done today and tomorrow is final. I’m leaving again on Wednesday. I don’t look forward to being on a trip again but it seems I could not bargain. Not that I didn’t try to move the dates, I didn’t have much options. Chinese New Year is around the corner. Many said I should stay in Ubud during the week for business is supposed to be better that week.

Fine.

Business scene on the way to Ubud. I just loved the jars.

Do one thing for 10,000 hours…

…then you become a genius! A friend told us over lunch. She read about it somewhere and thought she had started to believe it. We made a quick calculation of do one thing for 10 hours per day would take us less than three years to be a genius. She mentioned the Beatles as one example. How long they practiced music in a day? 12 hours! How long they were in business?

It’s been 24 hours that ADD-ADHD became my topic. The German gallery owner told us last night that meditation is not for him. He likes to move constantly doing things. My friend and I looked at each other. Sounds familiar. I might not be that ‘bad’ but like many of my friends I have itchy feet. If not my body, then my mind, that has developed a strong urge to move from one thing to another.

So I had chat with another two ADD-ADHD suspects this lunch. Both are close to 60 but – my – I might only spend half of their energy. People who need sleep less than 5-6 hours and need concentration to surrender to sleep. Auch! The pattern is so typical, we are creative but we might never reach genius level because we could hardly concentrate on one thing. So we discussed how we could excel at one thing by investing 3-4 years only. Not possible, for me.

I’m onto-next person. Like my friend who spent six hours with me today. We were busy in Neru selecting her China blue ceramic shard jewelry to be sold at Neru. Her jewelry is a real eye candy. You cannot miss when spot one. I imagined her spending hours working on the shards: drawing, cutting, and designing. It draws her energy very well. My restless friend.

I learned that taming ADD-ADHD biorhythm is a real decision. And I have decided.

My friend is busy taking pictures of her creation at Neru.

Today I learned about…

…listening. It was still early that I usually didn’t like to listen to music. Morning in Ubud is always nice quiet with the sound of birds, roosters, and rain. I altered my morning ritual a bit the past few days that makes me having more time in bedroom-cum-studio before going out. Cleaning has taken lots of my precious time in the morning, I don’t want it anymore. It’s a nice change, I enjoyed.

What about listening? I remembered I had audio books in iTunes copied from a friend's. I often wondered how it feels reading through listening. So here I was… ready to free my mind to learn something from an audio book Now, Discover Your Strengths by Marcus Buckingham while ironing.

Nice voice, clear articulation. I enjoyed. But wait a minute! Like having someone talking to me, I could not ignore! Meaning, I'm supposed not to just hear the voice but to listen as well! Thing that I thought it's easy and automatic turns out to be challenging – quite an experience. I ended up half listening and half paying attention to my ironing. Later when I did stretching, I even let my mind drifting away. When I was emailing, I didn’t follow what Buckingham said anymore.

That’s when I learned that listening to an audio book actually is like reading. It needs an undivided attention. Or maybe it’s just me? I could not imagine listening in car while driving. Would it be possible? I should not try. It got me thinking. When is the best time to listen? No more skipping pages.

It’s purnama. Yahoo News said it’s going to be the biggest and brightest full moon of 2009. It will appear about 14 percent bigger in our sky and 30 percent brighter than some other full moons during 2009, according to NASA. I really hope the sky clears up since it’s raining on and off all day. I could see thick gray cloud in the sky.

My evening was great. My Swiss friends and I attended an art exhibition opening in a gallery owned by a German. I met the artists for the first time in my great-grand-uncle’s exhibition opening at Museum Neka two years ago. These guys somehow had made their way into my heart. I just liked them. They call themselves 3 Brothers + 1. They are three brothers that have been suffering from Osteogenesis Imperfecta, an incurable disease of the bone structure, plus one brother (the youngest) was born without disability.

I met them several times in different art events around Ubud. I always spent time to talk with them about their work and art scene in Ubud and Bali. They are nice persons – soft and funny! And this evening they told the German that I’m a painting collector. Auch! I was so embarrassed.

They paint naïve style with strong emotion in it – like Frida Kahlo’s. It’s nice to look at but it’s too 'heavy' to put in living room. I don’t have say about the style, they lead not easy life with their physical condition. They barely have arms! In the end of the exhibition tour, my friend and I decided to buy Dali style paintings that look good in pairs. They look good together as panel but each has strong character as well so we agreed to take one each. Good we didn’t choose same painting, like with sister, we just knew what other like. I’m happy to have found a good size of surrealism painting in Ubud. And I am more than happy to support them.

It was raining hard when we moved to a nice restaurant nearby and when we went home. It was so hard that the water pouring like water fall from gutters. I had no chance to enjoy the first full moon day of 2009 but my artist friends have brightened up my day.

The sweet talented brothers waiting for their exhibition to open.

My sister once told me…

…that she often got inspiration in the shower. I do too actually. I could get inspiration anywhere and anytime but… I need to be by myself to be able to get my mind processing. Like writing, I need exclusive time with myself to process plots.

So what’s inspiration I got today? A new layout in Neru that I haven’t taken measure because of my staff’s day off. I need her advice as front liner. The inspiration had kept me in Ubud as initially I had a plan to go downtown. I reminded myself to stay focus to what I need to do first. Working on Neru new layout and merchandise, and that entails to… a lot!

So, I stayed home and reviewed all necklaces I made the past (almost) two years. It was not an easy task. I had let my self to… distraction! My friend in Manila buzzed me as she was about to market our stuffs for business for the first time. She already had a preview and got a very good response so we were quite excited about it. We talked through online chat to make sure all are fine. What a nice way to communicate – like we were in the same room, did our own things, but could chat anytime.

I made not-so-bad progress but could do better if I pushed myself harder. Well, I had nice time reading Lyrics by Sting – book among Christmas presents I got. I’m crazy about Sting that loved ones know. The book is so good. Sting is truly a writer. He likes and is good at writing, poems (lyrics) or stories. He gives comment on or story behind some lyrics he wrote. Some are touching, some are sad, some are deep.

Observing my day, I began to realize that my life has become unbalanced because of many things I want and need to do in a day. I need to go out, I want to create necklace or else at home, I have to look after family stuffs, I want to read, I need to meet people, I have to do household chores, I want to… wind down. Now I sound like complaining. Yes, I complain because I don’t mind doing it all.

Balance would find its way.

Necklaces on new trays I created with a local craftsman.

The past few days I read…

The Greatness Guide Book 2 by Robin Sharma. It’s a reawakening-reading book. He writes about simple things. Thing we have known in life but need Sharma to tap to remind us to be aware of what we do, of what we think. Nice book about 101 short ‘tips’ on life – if I could say that.

So Ideas are worthless he said. I buy his idea that ideation without execution is mere delusion. He continues In other words, an idea, no matter how big, only assumes value when it’s acted upon and brought to life. That’s what I observed this morning in relation with…

Another chapter of Sharma’s book. Leadership shows up when things at work – and in life – test us. Each of us, as a Leader Without Title, must rise to that challenge. We need to shine when things don’t go as planned. And we have to take charge. That’s what I felt in the morning. I had a list of persons to call to clear up some items that have been waiting for my action. I just don’t like it. I don’t like calling people! But these challenges?

So I beat the feeling. I became a "serial dialer" like Paulson known for. I just did it to get the items off the list. I made it! I also made a trip downtown to get more items off. Feel so good. I chatted with some people I know. It was nice to go out and learn from people I met. Thing I know but not enough to kick me out of shell.

Anyway, I’m happy to be a Leader Without Title today. If I could call myself one.

Balinese orchids from Pak Agung to welcome me home the other day. He is one example of a Leader Without Title – in my view.

Everything has its own…

…time and place. I concluded it simply because spicy salted nuts I brought from Manila tasted ‘different’ here. I craved for the nuts there but here? It was so different that I didn’t feel like having it. Then I took other examples. Yea, the books I brought also gave me different mood. I browsed them but it’s so cold that I don’t feel like reading it now. Maybe later.

I started the day very well. In high spirit to finish up stuffs I still had from yesterday. I canceled my plan to go out doing errands because of the bogged down unfinished stuffs I kept. Actually, it's because I already have a lot going on in my mind. Ideas ideas ideas…

The chairwoman of the Heritage personally invited me to participate in Art and Photography Exhibition 2009 in March. I forwarded the email to friends I know like to create both art mediums but at the same time I also dug out what I had in my storage. It’s been long I had the idea to expose artwork I made two years ago. So I opened my art blog that has been abandoned long time now. I had one artwork in mind that matches the Images of Indonesia theme.

Browsing through my art blog – Blucolage – I felt like traveling to the old me. I must say I liked my work. It had amazed me how I came to the idea of cutting small pieces of magazine pages. I also gathered fans from other countries those days. It was fun! I collaborated with an artist from Chile that I don’t remember how it started. We contacted each other and just did it! I guess. Anyway…

There are time and place.

The collaboration artwork in question. Please also check out Fiestoforo blog.

Eleven days away is enough…

…to see changes in my area. The resort development nearby is near to end. My next door neighbor has moved out. And, the sad thing is… Yumi has been out of salon business. Been learning her plan to close down her business for months, I didn’t take her plan I heard a day before Christmas seriously. I thought it’s another sentimental decision she often made. She is serious this time!

So I miss the salon! And that’s not the only. Today I sold my Cherokee! Finally, after I let it go from my heart five months ago. Cousin Aga and some of my friends liked to persuade me to keep the car just because the car and I looked good together! Not that I didn’t consider the idea, I actually had a hard time to close my heart from my 10-year-old buddy. I had passed the period. I am ready to move forward. My only formula to keep going with my plan.

Apart from those changes around me, I had a good day at home. Cleaning, tidying, and bookkeeping. It’s just perfect to prepare a New Year with a clean slate. Cleaning outstanding matters to prepare a good ground to take off.

I am ready!

My next door neighbor’s house looked empty after she left.

I feel like I had a day of…

…sleeping and eating. I slept short because of my 6:30 flight. I was lucky to sit in front row so got ample space for legs. I was supposed to sit next to a huge guy but I managed to ask the guy in aisle to exchange seat with me. Not (just) about the huge guy but I didn’t like the idea of being sandwiched by two men. So I dozed off almost all the way to Hong Kong.

I was a bit frozen. I dressed up for Bali, forgot about winter in Hong Kong. The sun was nice but offered no warm at all. I finished sandwich the airline served not just because I liked the bread but also I needed to have something to beat the cold. My sister used to say that I don’t have enough fat to beat cold. Maybe.

Hong Kong airport looked alive in the morning. The gate was not far so I had enough time to check out shops. And Muji To Go had stopped me. I saw its blog the other day and was amazed at a team of Japanese’s creativity. The team designs products ‘we don’t need’ but ‘would like to need’ because they are so cute. Very Japanese. Muji To Go specializes in travel knickknacks like pouches, collapsible bags of many shapes, and of course stuffs you don’t need because you already have a lot back home (photo frame, alarm clock, CD player, calculator, and hundreds other things) but you are itchy to have from Muji because again… it’s so cute!

Was nice. I enjoyed. Before entered my departure gate, I took time enjoying hazy mountains from huge glass windows. China is mystical. That’s what I miss…

So I dozed again, read a bit, then ate, dozed, read, dozed, dozed, ate, dozed, dozed, dozed… to Bali. All were in five hours. I managed to finish Time magazine and very few pages of a book only. I also ate very well. Landed in Bali, I had very early dinner with my cousin. At home, I was back to my routine: mango and yogurt for dinner. Oh I ate a lot. Was that the reason why I felt sleepy all day?

Hazy mountains I missed in China.

I remember the feeling…

…of spending the last day of a school holiday. I guess everybody has the same feeling. The feeling of wanting to clutch the hands of time from running fast. The same routine would soon be back. Wake up early, do chores, plan the day, plan the big picture, deal with complicated stuffs, meet friends, run errands… It’s life! I would be bored if I have to be on holiday for ever. I need activities.

I kept things slow today. I packed up in the morning already. I don’t like to do it last minute especially because I have very early flight tomorrow. My stuffs are scattered around the place and I do not always remember all at once where. I would carry lots of books and DVDs this time. Interesting books! Funny. When I have weight restriction (15 kgs!), I ended up carrying 25 kgs. When I have ample weight allowance (25 kgs!), I don’t have idea what to carry. I would bring with me my nice wooden low stool I bought in August. I love woodwork – any kind, anything.

Today I got inspiration from my friend to make a compilation of ancestor pictures. I often thought about what I can do with old pictures of great-grands and grands that I found quite many in Malang house. I never had an idea to throw them away but I only got an idea to just select and make a nice ‘sample’ of the old days (of our ancestors) in an album. I could share the album with my sister so we in the end keep old pictures that have been stored in our parents’ house for years. Nice idea.

The day felt short today. My mind is already busied with what I’m going to do when I’m back. My scheduler has back to work even Monday has not yet started. It seems a good sign. I look forward to experiencing 2009. The year of make-things-happen, lots of traveling, and good finance for a Fire Horse like me.

Children playground in a nearby park that has reminded me that holiday is over.

This time…

…I don’t question where time has gone. I must have used up my time very well. Some people I met showed their amazement how 2008 gone like dust blown by the wind. While reminded myself, I said that we must have enjoyed and used our time very well. What a luxury! Because I also know people who just wait for time to pass from day to day. Not that they plan it that way, they just don’t know how to use time in a fun way.

So, this is the beginning of a new year. While I keep my resolution (if any) light and simple, actually it came out not as simple as I thought. A friend wanted to focus on simplicity and strength this year. It’s nice two word kind of resolutions. I worked on the two concepts to see if those fit my goals for the year. Later I realized that simple thing comes from a complicated process actually. To me then simplifying means complicates self in a way. Hm… Having pondered about it for some times, I might like to keep taking things one at a time – that has been my formula since long – or swallowing (to be precise) complicated things one at a time.

How’s life? I shopped a bit, eat more a bit, window shopped a bit, but talked and thought a lot. Ya, that’s what I need as part of… mm taking stock?

Manila is cold today. It was 23 degree Celsius when I got up before 6. I had to wear sarong around shoulders to keep me from chattering. It was nice even in the afternoon, it felt like Bali in August. When I shared with my friend in Beijing how cold Manila at the moment, she shouted (I imagined) Honey, you don’t know cold. Come to Beijing!! I replied Thank you!

My friend and I visited a sneakers boutique in an unlikely location near a… car wash! The look from outside is so deceiving. No sign, just windows with sacks of (later I found out) sands as display and an OPEN neon sign. If no one let us know about the shop, our first impression could be a… toko beras (a shop selling rice)!

The shop is in the second floor, again, it’s against normalcy since the storage is downstairs instead. It’s a classy little shop – very male shop because it only sells male sneakers. The specialty of the shop is selling limited edition or signature shoes of well-known brands. Shoes that have higher price in secondary market and are well-sought in eBay. The shop-keeper is Canadian who masters the story behind any shoes: why the shoes are designed like it, what year, who inspired the design (that includes the fake Milli-Vanilli)… It was really fun to listen to him telling stories about shoes the shop carries.

My friend decided to 'carry' two pairs of shoes. I smiled. Shopping in a place like such has reminded me of my RIP Frangipani in Jakarta. I used to tend the shop and acted like the guy. This way of selling works very well. People like (hi)story. Trust me!

The interesting window display of the shoe shop in Fort Bonifacio. The sacks of sands representing the name of the shop. Can you guess what?

I had nice first day…

…of the year. Do things I did not normally do is a luxury. Eat whatever, sleep whenever, do whatever… I have passed half of my holiday. I don’t want to think about it. It crawls faster when nearing end. I know.

I spent New Year evening in friends’ house in a satellite city near Makati – Fort Bonifacio. It was a nice get together observing the Filipinos tradition. It was fun to learn about people's belief. We ‘tried’ to finish late dinner before midnight, then prepared at least 13 different fruits that have round shape (the spirit of ‘no end’ except pineapple for the thousand eyes and crown). And more, they were supposed to finish 13 grapes before midnight followed by a green banana to ward off evil after midnight. And as for single? They are supposed to jump on the floor several times. I don’t quite understand the philosophy behind the 13 and the jump things. It was just fun to watch while recalled what I have back home.

Anyway, I didn’t follow all (I only had a few minutes before midnight to figure out how to finish 13 grapes on time). Instead, I had the tradition of having champagne followed by lots of pomelo and some Filipino sweets that tasted like Nyonyah cuisine. It was delicious. The crowd was fun. The firecrackers were big! It hit the sky in the hour. We enjoyed the bright light from kitchen windows. The smog after it was enough to cover tall buildings and the fume? I cared about security who had to stand outside the buildings. And if you forget to close windows and doors at home? Well…

I spent some time today to change my blog look while relearned how to work on HTML. I’m considering to learn more seriously how to do website designing this year. I’m curious to explore this skill. This is among many I want to do and learn this year. I enjoy looking back what I had done in 2008 while considering new goals.

An artwork a good friend sent to mark the New Year. It sounded not happy but I see it from different point. It’s just beautiful so the poem. Thank you, GA!