What Works for Me

Yesterday, I was nervous almost all day before Mbok Yan had the Ubud house key with her. Like any agreement, nothing is sure before actual execution. I trust the owner but something can happen beyond our control. To remind Mbok Yan, I sent her text message in the morning and called her in the afternoon. There’s nothing I could do because she was still at work to 18:00.

But of course I got the key in the evening!!! I felt like celebrating! I was high the rest of the evening. It’s like a dream comes true. I just remembered – when a friend asked how I found the house – actually it’s me who found the house, not my ‘agent’ Mbok Yan. We went to see the first house, the one inside a little ‘jungle’. I saw the back of a house with nice white curtain in windows downstairs and upstairs. I asked Mbok Yan but she thought that it could not be available. I insisted to see the house after the ‘disappointing’ first house.

I must say. I like it at first sight. I became quite nervous knowing the other bungalow has been rented for a year by an American who hardly came. And the other was still occupied. I forgot when I got the information but it was quite immediate that I knew it would be vacant in two days. My heart was dancing with joy but still… I hadn’t known the rate. It scared me since the first house cost me way over my budget (for such quality and atmosphere).

I think later the day I knew that the house is affordable – for me. It’s a bit over my initial budget but I could not get any better, I had to revise my budget :-) So that’s the story. I was about to say yes without checking the inside because I thought I had no time to check in the next morning. I was so lucky that morning when I came to take pictures, the girl who occupied the house was about to go and let me in to see. The house is very me. I had the picture in my mind since my architect friend offered me to design a yoga studio with Indian touch. That’s all I need, two-story building with empty space – studio type. Ah it’s perfect. I am so excited.

Today, I worked quietly making necklaces since 4:30. I was high in creating. I was thinking that working should not be this easy. I don’t feel like I'm working, it’s more having fun, but of course I could not agree with the notion. I am working.

Mama gave me hint that she still wanted me to work using my academic knowledge. I care about what she feels but I also ask myself if I really want to do. I told her the next day that I wish I could do both but somehow I know it won’t work. I cannot excel in both at the same time because I like to focus on one. And doing art is my choice now. I reminded Mama that it’s good that I have both: the academic and art sides. I have options to use either or both. I guess it calmed Mama – even for a while :-)

Well, what looks so easy to do for me actually it doesn’t apply to every body. So I can still count what I do as working. Now, I also need to convince myself :-)

Photo of the house front door.