Time to Say

I claimed my holiday after the NY holiday today. I was too lazy to get up in the morning. I stayed half awake in bed for a long time trying to lay a plan (of I didn’t know) but of course it was impossible. I missed my long morning but a good friend told me that never too late to start a good day. So I started..

I was in between wanting to have a good time with friends and spend the day by myself. I kept listening to what I wanted while creating a collage. My mind was idle. I was not interested in doing yoga or reading. I have lost the only kilogram I gained last month. I have lost appetite; even DHA’s KK donut doesn’t attract me anymore. I start to skip nasi for dinner because I prefer wheat loaf more. One of those days :-)

I ended up spending time at home having fun with collage while talking over phone with some close persons. Reaching out. It’s been awhile I hadn’t had contact with cousins and some other persons.

I thought about ego a lot today. It’s ego that makes someone upset. It’s ego that makes persons stop reaching out. It’s ego that makes someone becomes possessive. It's my ego that makes Chiko has to be sterilized. I found out many attitudes are centered on personal ego. I’m not sure what the theory says..

Today I found out two friends trying to reach out; it’s nice to know. Reaching out is not an easy thing to do. I appeared to be a demanding friend the other day when I reached out; it was in the wrong mood and definitely wrong time. Whatever, I’m glad that I have done since I needed to express -- to reach out. For me, reaching out is always a right attitude. And it always touches me when someone gives me space to not respond like what CAT wrote me I hope you keep in touch with me if you can or don't mind.

CAT, my lost friend from the art-group. We lost contact with her since last summer. Her family was not allowed to return to Indonesia and it had devastated her. It took six months for her to recover from the shock. I appreciate her effort to reconnect with me and us. I care about her. A nice quiet artist friend.

Anyway, I finished three collages although I’m hoping to create more. It has drained me for no reason. I want to spend my evening reading :-)

Photo of my time to say collage.