I feel ‘sick and dark.’

My sister confessed to me her feeling that she enjoyed watching and reading Dexter. She almost finishes four books of Dexter by Jeff Lindsay. I remember she is good in reading ‘sick and dark’ stories like Stephen King’s since we lived in Jakarta over a decade ago. I didn’t explore this side in me before. I thought I like melancholy stories more. I was wrong. Later I found out I also enjoyed Stephen King’s novels she passed down. And my other side developed since then…

I admit, I’m addicted to Dexter. I could see me in him. He is cold but he is thoughtful. He appears to be unusual but he is actually just a human. He converses with his inner self before doing anything because he cannot afford miscalculating his steps in finishing a target. He is a monster pretending to be a human. That’s what he thinks. So where am I in the picture?

Today I watched three episodes. I don’t want to finish it quickly but it seems I could only hope. In one episode, he is close to be caught by his sister cop and friends in police department. His enemy put him under close observation that he watches every move he makes. So when he kills a couple killers, the enemy put the body back in crime scene from the bottom of the sea where he throw away all evidences. That’s when I saw his human side with fear and acknowledgment that he can also miscalculate. But he comes out with a good moral of the experience, knowing that his days are numbered, he decides to make the best of his time. Now.

I got news that my car can only be ready end of next week. One more week without car! I have to McGyver-ing my life at home longer. It’s like how to spend time at home productively and 'independently.' My niece was nice to take me to supermarket when she was here that I shopped groceries enough for another five days at least. That’s when I also need to be a McGyver in kitchen too. I have my fridge full of fruits and veggies; and a variety of ready made salad dressings. I have eaten veggies a lot and today I worked on potato. It’s fun!!

Now I have to work on my soon-to-be-old cabinet. I need to take everything out since tomorrow at 7 a.m. Ngurah will deliver two old cabinets in Pallava to replace the one I got with the house. It has become too small for my ever-extending wardrobe. After so many travels, my cabinet could not hold more clothes. It’s loaded!!

7 a.m.? This is Bali where anything else have to fall before or after ceremony.

Halloween pumpkin in a restaurant in Jakarta.